Valerie thought back to the morning, when a crème donut had beckoned in a coffee shop. Considering the sugar content, she chose a slightly less decadent cruller. But it was unsatisfyingly stale. Perhaps the disappointing flavor mingled with a taste of regret, because she hadn’t been true to her desire.

Walking on the ice now, came another lament – that earlier in life she hadn’t taken time to visit more glaciers.

In youth her boots had tread on some of the greats; Grinnell, Athabasca, Mer de Glace, Theodul, Aletsch, Emerald, and others. Over the years Valerie watched them all inexorably shrink as the world warmed. There were so many of their compatriots that her gaze would never contemplate, melting away before their time.

Now back at Grinnell, the ice sheet had retracted behind the lake at its toe. The retreat left a moat which Valerie was not equipped to ford.  Today it seemed that ambling on glacial remnants would not be possible; the skree-covered white could only be admired from a distance.

Sitting on a slab by the lough, her thoughts drifted as the fog slowly lifted and the view opened up. The stone bridge was unobtrusive at first. It was just a pile of rocks. Yet Thoreau had admonished that it is not what we look at that matters, but what we see.

Patterns began to emerge on proterozoic chunks half-submerged across the mouth of the stream in front of her. She imagined how feet could dance across them to ford the water. On the other side the glacier waited. Her way had been there all along, invisible until she looked for it.

She hesitated.  A moment ago her way was blocked, and she had been resigned to remorse for things left undone.  But now a bridge of stepping stones was showing a path forward.  Could she also find a way to get over her regret?

She would think about that.  But for now Valerie went. Not tentatively, because indecision would make knees weak, when feet had to be sure. So she strode assertively.

Once across, the glacier was soon under foot. It was a smaller ice field this year – so low there were no caves, just shallow undercuts and arches.

“We’re getting older. You and I,” she murmured. “One day we will both be gone.”

After a while of wandering in solitude, Valerie turned back to the trailhead. The stone bridge was again indiscernible at first. But as before the sequence presented itself, and she was across.

The other side felt different somehow.  The melancholy of earlier was gone.

Beyond the saddle it was easier going downhill.  She stopped to look back.  The ice was like an old friend – how many more times would they meet before one or both of them were gone?

Valerie decided that she was not leaving Grinnell as much as hurrying to their next reunion – certainly they would get one more visit together.

Yet if today was to be the last, it would be ok. She could be grateful for their yesterdays. Reflecting a growing introspection as it deliquesced, Grinnell shared some of its wisdom. The morning had started with disappointment but her recovery was now complete.

“Those tomorrows we expect might never arrive.” She hadn’t wasted today.

——————–

© 2023-25 by Dean Jen